If you’ve heard the phrase “if it’s too good to be true, it probably is” and you believed it, this blog’s for you. Infomercials and the tackiest of car salesmen aside, why do we assume that things cannot be wonderful? Your instincts don’t lie, but your brain sure does.
To further complicate matters, if you have lost confidence in your instincts, you end up listening to the loudest voices in your head. Ever go against what you knew to be true (i.e. your instincts), because your brain said you should? Exactly how well did that work out for you? hehe! If that’s happened to you, it’s time to boost your belief in you and here are a few ideas.
Pay Attention to How You Feel.
Most of the time, if you don’t feel good about something your instincts are telling you it’s not a good choice for you. That person you want to hire, who creates that feeling that something’s just not right, is probably not a good choice. Good feelings, positive emotions, usually mean good choices, if you’re really paying attention to how you feel, versus what you think you should do. Stop “shoulding” all over yourself, as I’ve often heard!
Increase Your Confidence by Saying No
We all know the feeling of having said yes, but really wanting to say no and usually we say yes because we don’t’ know what else to say. You don’t have to say “no” or be ugly about your response. Just say “Something about this doesn’t feel right for me” and if someone says “Why?” you can always say “I’m not sure.” You will feel better about having stood up for what you need or believe in and for not having offended the other person.
Decisions and choices when you feel like the pit of a cherry instead of viewing your world as a merry bowl of cherries, usually lead to negative results. Start finding things to appreciate or feel good about and your feelings will improve as well as your contagious confidence level, your ability to “hear” what’s important to you, and your ability to follow your own instincts.
When you know you’re one gifted, talented, amazing, and wonderfully smart “cookie”, not only do you find yourself surrounded by others who share these traits, your confidence becomes contagious!
So what do you need to say no to or get happy about?
Monica Wofford, MBA, CSP, is an international speaker, trainer, and author who helps managers who were promoted, actually become prepared to lead.